and... nothing. Not a single response.
Bloody hell.
To say that I'm disappointed would be an understatement.
Nothing to do now but leave the state in shame. (j/k)
No, seriously though, Jess is looking to move and I need a roommate.
It'd be a new town with new places to explore. The Strip at night. Bryce Canyon, Zion, Hoover Dam, the Grand Canyon, Red Rock; all less than 3 hours away. Could be absolutely fantastic for my photography.
Could rent a house there for cheaper than we could get a 2bdr hole in the wall here. We could have an art room/studio. OhmygodYES.
Paul is hung up on this (passive-aggressively controlling) girl and doesn't have his shit together. I don't know if he ever will at this point. He was supposed to have a job and be ready to move by August initially; now MAYBE sometime in October. His brother ran off with some of the family money so now Paul is giving all his money to them for mortgage and bill payments. I had to pay for Chipotle last night because he says he was flat broke.
I seriously worry about him being able to handle a budget and pay bills. It's not that I think he's irresponsible, I just don't think he understands all the costs that are going to be involved. For the entire time I've known him he's been used to being able to just say "hey, I want that, I can take my next $700 paycheck and blow it all to get that". Besides, I also don't want to have to change my lifestyle if she were to start coming over all the time and expect that we're going to change our plans because she doesn't like to do that (specifically in regards to hanging out and gaming).
I'll have to look more into jobs and housing and see if it's feasible. Draw up a plan and a budget. Maybe take a trip out there next week and look at places.
I did it.
I sent that last personals response that I've been agonizing over. Don't know why I was so worried about FUCKING this one up but I was. I rewrote it a dozen times. Finally just took the leap and sent the first thing I'd written. Yeah it was cheesy... but it has me written all over it. And that's what I'm doing here anyway right? Trying to find someone who complements me.
Well its out there now in the ether. Nothing left to do but wait.
An Unproductive Weekend
Well this has been a bit of a waste. I haven't done much these last couple of days and it's really bugging me. Just stayed around the house and worked on the computer. Got caught up on news, worked on some pictures, played some Dead Island (finally got it to work!), set up the futon in the backroom so that I have something to sleep on other than the floor, saw Kick-Ass 2 last night with my cousin.
I feel unproductive. Unfulfilled. I don't know why. I don't know what I should be doing.
Something is wrong and I can't put my finger on it.
I did get a few photos "finished". I'm not totally happy with the one of Jess or the sunflower.
Another day, another update. If I'm not careful this may grow to become a habit.
I texted that girl yesterday, asking her to dinner and a movie tonight; yes, the old tried and true cliche. Kick Ass 2 comes out today and she seemed like she might be a comic book girl.
No dice though. She declined, saying that she was going to her mother's for the weekend. I'm not certain if that's just a "sorry, I'm busy" or an actual rejection. To be honest, the date the other night didn't go spectacularly. Still, we both seemed super-duper nervous; I really wanted to give it another chance.
Ah well, I guess Paul is going to be my date for tonight :P
He wants to hang out and get away from Anna for a bit. I stopped by the storage unit and picked up Space Hulk and a few other games and perhaps we'll catch that movie after all. I've been missing hanging out with him but I don't really feel up to another awkward outing with Anna. Again, not that I have anything against her but hanging out with a friend's SO, especially a seemingly temperamental one who doesn't communicate well if something is bothering her, shifts the entire focus of the evening to not offending her and making her happy. Kinda sucks when all you want to do is relax.
I should get off my ass and message that other girl on OkCupid. A part of me worries that too much is in transition right now and that starting a relationship would be bad juju. Another part thinks that it's about GODDAMN TIME that I got off my ass and tried to meet people.
I spent a bit of time looking at Seattle rentals last night. It certainly seems affordable. I'm not sure how I feel about things yet. On one hand I think it'll be an adventure. On the other, leaving home is a scary proposition. I'll have to let it sit a while and see how I feel a month or two down the road.
The last 8 months have been rife with change.
The girl and I briefly reconnected before her false nature reasserted itself and we once again parted ways, this time for good (and good riddance).
My friend and his family returned ahead of schedule with almost no notice and I've been uprooted. I don't mind the transition but I now deeply regret ever having agreed to house-sit for them in the first place. I agreed because I foolishly thought I'd feel responsible for any escalation in their marital strife. Certain things were said prior to my agreeing that led me to believe they were heading for a very rough patch and perhaps even a split (and I now realize that the only person who would have been responsible for such would have been my friend). I'm left feeling ill-used. I think I'll keep my distance for a while.
My prospective roommate has all but disappeared. He's seeing a girl again who's monopolizing all his time. I liked her well enough until we tried to see a movie without her and she threw a bit of a tantrum (after giving him permission). Now I don't know. I don't see it working out in the long run but he doesn't want to be alone and doesn't know how to assert himself. We're still supposed to be moving out next month. We'll see.
Vegas girl recently proposed a backpacking trip to Europe with her and another friend sometime next May.
She also just asked if I wanted to move to Seattle with her next year.
I'm thinking about it.
